Suomi in extremis

Tom sometimes accuses me of being black and white. After a few weeks in Finland I wonder if this is perhaps a manifestation of my Finnish roots.


Finns live in a world of extremes and consequently like a lot of dark, and a lot of light, things:
Dark things
- Reikaleipa (circular unleavened rye bread traditionally dried on poles across the ceiling. Finns have developed special teeth to process this igneous delicacy).
- Coffee (Finns are the caffeine kings of Europe, apparently consuming 14kg of coffee a year. Lonely Planet equates this to, on average, 9 cups a day, but my guess is that it is simply the strength of the stuff they drink that requires so much bean).
- Salmiakki (salt liquorice. Tastes as disgusting as it sounds. But Finns love it, even in ice cream and vodka).
- Mammi (special cold, sweet rye porridge. Only eaten at Easter for a “treat”).
- Hair dye (gone are the flaxen Scandinavian locks in favour of various shades of black hair dye. Usually set with black jeans, black t-shirt and black accessories).
- Heavy music (Iron Maiden were in town on Friday. Now half the population of Helsinki are sporting tour t-shirts. Home-grown favourites include CMX and Maj Karma. This is the land where Lordi is considered light pop).

Light things
- Beer (regardless of which beer you buy they all look and taste like lager. A nation of binge drinkers without a palette).
- Midnight sun (it really doesn’t set. This screws up the body clock and makes dinner at 2:30am seem acceptable).
- Snow (and lots of it. White and pure. Used for cross-country skiing and rolling post-sauna).
- Cheese (it’s either emmental or gouda in varying strengths. All anaemic and bland).
- Villi (a stringy plain yoghurt that behaves like glue).
- Potatoes (they love them. And talk about them, a lot. The peruna is a staple of the Finnish diet).

Of the above I only enjoy a few outside the context of novelty. I don’t enjoy the extremes of hot and cold between sauna and lake , and found even the Scottish winters too long and dark. So maybe the English side of my heritage does allow for some degree of grey.